I just have to share this random story with you all...
I went to the doctor the other day for my last appointment with OB GYN concerning Shea Baby. As you can imagine, I have been to the hospital quite a few times the past 10 months and have become pretty familiar with the nurses. One in particular seemed to show a special interest in me and we had a nice rapport with one another.
When I first became pregnant I was rocking a fresh big chop cut and with each appointment my hair has gotten bigger and bigger. This nurse would compliment me all the time on my hair but never asked any questions about it. She would mostly comment on how well I was pulling off my short DO.
On this particular day, my hair was looking pretty good (if I may say so myself!). I did a co-wash and styled my hair with Coconut Confidence and Cutie Juice Cocktail .My curls were like Orville Redenbacher, they were POPPING!!!!! The nurse came into my room where I was changing into the hospital gown and she was complimenting me on how good I look for just having the baby and then she commented on my hair.
Nurse: Your hair is so nice.
Me: Thanks!!
Nurse: So what do you do, just shampoo it and curl it?
Me: Um, Yes. Wait, no.. I...
Nurse: You have a perm right? You just shampoo it and roll it up?
Me: { At this point I was trying to figure out whether to try and explain that I don't shampoo and that I co-wash, not to mention I was completely thrown off at the mention of the relaxer} No, I just condition it and moisturize with Shea Butter.
Nurse: But how do you get the curls?
Me: My hair is just naturally like this.
Nurse: {Blank stare} Oh. That's nice. Doctor Johnson will be right in. {she exits, looking completely perplexed}
Has this happened to you? People finding your hair too good to be true? Have you had people mistake your hair for weave and ask you what type of hair you have in your head (I guess so they can go buy some!)? Have you had someone think your hair was still relaxed even when you haven't used any heat whatsoever?
I was shocked and thrown off by this incident. I mean I did a wash-n-go for crying out loud. Nothing about my hair says relaxer! NOTHING!! I'm not gonna lie, I was a bit offended. I want everyone to know I'm a natural and I thought you could tell just by looking at me.... maybe not. Or maybe she was.. I don't know... high or something.
Perhaps I need this:
What's your take on this? Has anything similar ever happened to you? Would you be insulted/offended if someone accused your kinks or curls of being chemically manipulated? Please share.
~Sunshine
15 comments:
perosnally i wouldnt get offended--how can i be offended by someone who doesnt know or understand black hair?!---there are alot of people out there who are not educated about the goodness of our hair--dont let it block the positive vibez you got going on inside of that beautiful head momma!--
I get that question all the time "what weave did you use?" when my afro is loose or "what kind of extensions did you use for your kinky twists" lol. When I tell them it's all me, they insist on poking my head and digging through my hair to feel my scalp, as if I'm lying *rolls eyes*
Just keep being fly Sunshine, you might have inspired her to go natural, you never know...
woot woot!
hey girl...thanks for posting my necklace!
anyway...I get this A LOT...people really have a hard time beleiving that natural hair is really NATURAL...like I had to process it wuth chemicals for it to be curly..newsflash, we were born wih curly hair!
black women especially think I have a texturizer..."what did you do to get it like that?"
makes me mad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thats why ya'll need to get this necklace!!!!!
discount if you mention you saw it on this post!!!
: )
First off congratulations on your little bundle of joy!!
Now, I too have had people ask me, "How do you get your hair to do that? You have a texturizer or something?" I always laugh and tell them that this is what God gave me and that they should consider it. Most times they laugh and say, "Oh my hair would never look like that," and I tell them, "How do you know?" That's just it, people have (will) not take(n) the time to test out what their natural hair would look like. A few of them I am sure would be surprised.
This happened to me not that long ago. A young black girl came up to me in line at the movie concession stand and asked "what kind is that?" I had NO idea what she was talking about so I was the one to stare blankly. She was like "what kind of hair?" I told her it was mine, now shocked. She simply said "oh" and walked away :-o
yes, this has definitely happened! my own sister-in-law was like, "where did you get your wig?" and i was like, "ummm...God?" LOL! i just try to help the masses understand that it's mine, and yes, you have your own too=o)
This has happened to me from time to time , but you know you will come across some haters every now and then, lol. But, I thank you handled it well. Btw, you've been tagged check out my blog, aunaturale007.blogspot.com
take care (smiles)
this has happened to me when a girl complimented me on my blow-out. the front of my hair has very loose waves, naturally, and the girl thought i used heat to achieve this look when, really, i roll out of bed this way. for shame! lol.
4th of July I had my hair in a puff, my aunt asked me how did I get my hair "spirally" and I replied "with a lot of water LOL" She looked at me like I was lying I guess I should have explained that I spray my hair with a watery mix then shake my puff. I felt a bit hurt like I was lying. Also on Thanksgiving my daughter finally met the other side of her family and one relative asked if she had a jerry curl....like constantly LOL. My husband had to reply no its natural and they went, "With what juices and berries". It was a little funny when I thought about the pun from Coming to America since we were all laughing, but once again I was a little mad because they acted like we were lying.Also a little insulting that I would do something so harsh to my 16 month old's scalp just to appeal to people. Because she doesn't give a damn how her hair looks LOL
This has happened to me as well. It's usually men who make this type of comment. I can somewhat understand their curiosity; I have yet to find a "hair twin." I take it as a compliment =)
I'm transitioning and I'm 5 months post. I've been answering questions from the girls at my job (1 hispanic, 1 white). They are fascinated. One so much so her hand is always in my hair and she is using the word "kinky". I have no problem with this but my mama told me I should help her out bc another black woman would probably wanna knock her out or cut her for using the term, lol.
LOL...I get this ALL the time, especially now that I have this color in my hair that really makes my curls POP. One of my co-workers (a guy) asked me if I had a straw set, and when I was in the Goodwill last week a woman with beautiful long dreads asked me how I got my hair the way it is. My immediate thought was that she was refering to my color and when I started explaining that it was supposed to be Blonde she was like "No, how do you get your hair like it is?" So I'm like "Ohhhhhh...I just wet and go." She was so disappointed in my answer that she sucked her teeth and rolled her eyes. LMAO...gee lady...people are really funny.
I get that when I wear my puff. Since it's so massive folks are like where did you buy it. When I told a woman it was mine she responded ok...but they do sell it a the beauty supply? I was like I'm sure they do.
Sooo true!!! I definitely just had an experience like that. My hair is curly and coily 'fro and my friends and I were hanging out at a friend's house one night when some of the guys there were commenting on how our group of girls were all unique and beautiful and whatnot. So when they got to me this one guys shouts "I like the girl with the nappy a** head! Lemme get tangled in there!" and everyone laughs. I explained that combing is actually pretty easy for me and he (along with some of his friends) begged to touch it and even pull on it! They were all enthralled with my texture, most stating it couldn't be real. It was actually pretty entertaining lol but I kinda felt sorry that an african american man(who had locks) didn't even have knowledge about the beauty of the women of his race, and apparently his own hair!
When I was in grad school, I had to attend a conference over the weekend and decided to sport a big curly fro, I usually flat ironed my chin length bob but for some reason at the time I decided to wear my natural texture. EVERYONE was like "what did you DO to your hair?" and I was really amused and kept explaining to each person, "well generally, black people have curly hair and it looks like this when we don't DO anything!"
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